Birthday....

Birthday... The day which marked the beginning of my life on this earth, and the day which comes with a BIG question every year thrown at me. The question that always frightens me.

Every year I mark the D day as the exam day; the exam which examines my life in the passed year.And somehow i fall below the expectations of mine in the exam and this is what frightens me and makes me feel dizzy about my birthday.

Birthday is another normal day for me, except that I take head bath :-) and call my mom without fail. For some years, there used to be some midnight calls from my close(?) friends, which stopped after one time.I never believed in midnight calls and wished them only during the day so they never repeated their calls :-)

However there are few friends of mine who are genuine enough and call me on the same day or after 2-3 days. Believe me; I feel good on receiving their calls.

This year, since it was my first birthday after the marriage;I had few expectations from my husband but thought that they would never materialize as he was very sick during my birthday.I had least expectations as he was very ill and was very week. But to my surprise he wakes me at 3.00 A.M,(he being still dizzy due to the tablets); asks me to cut the cake and then gifts me bunch of roses,chocolate and a gentle..... :-)

It was such a nice pleasant surprise and I loved it. And this years day was spent in the office from 9.00 Am to 9.00 PM. A "WORKING BIRTHDAY". And I enjoyed it the most, with good work and greater responsibilities.

Hoping to have one birthday which would make me satisfied of what I have achieved..

Use and Throw...

How do you feel when all of a sudden, the work you were doing is done by others without you being informed. Its really a strange feeling making you feel frustrated as well as irritated. Both the adjectives are needed to show the amount of anger you feel in this scenario.

Its human nature, whether you like or dislike doing that job, if it is given to someone else without you knowing about it, they tend to feel down or anxious.

This is fine as long as there is proper communication done before allotting the work, whatever may be the reason(you being less efficient or ur over paid) but when it is done in 100% opacity, it is unethical.

This is the truth in software industry.. you are indispensable today and tomorrow you are disposable.. After all we are "Use and Throw" and not "Renewable" resources.

Spoiling your day...

Sometimes our behaviour is so silly... I was ashamed of myself today for the way i behaved yesterday with him.I did not realise that I was wrong until I read AB's blog where he has posted one of the mail forwards.

Yesterday I was doing my home work with the laptop for the next days office work and he was studying some of the tools in the other room.After an hour or so, he came up and said, lets go out and have masala puri. I reluctantly said yes as i was in no mood to go out since I was engrossed in studying. we went out, strolled around and came back. I started preparing chapatis after coming back.

At the same time, there was a daemon process was happening in my mind at the back end. Lots of thoughts were going on, since few weeks I was not able to be spending some time on my reading and that had really upset me yesterday. I was missing that time where I was with myself and reading lazily on bed.And somehow I thought that reason was him. and so i did not speak to him. He kept pestering me what was the reason. I just changed the topic and opened my laptop and started reading.

Now i feel bad for myself for accusing him although the real reason was me. I could not spend time on reading because I was too lazy and spent most of the time watching TV. But still I spoiled my day with useless thoughts and spoiling the mood of his and mine.

We had spent the whole day outside shopping and had nice time but i spoiled it in the night by my useless moody behaviour.

Sigh.. I will try to avoid and be less moody in future... :'-(

Dauda Dauda Bhaaga Bhaaga sa...

Run.Run.Run.. huh this is the theme of my post today. Yeah "Man runs behind the illusion".But philosophy is not the topic today. I have been running behind almost everything these days literally.

Life has gained the momentum all of a sudden and I am still not able to cope up with it.There is sudden outburst of work in the office,there are tensions in the current project and there is some new work assigned as well, which needs some reading.

Back to the home, he is very busy and is facing some tensions at office and is not keeping well. So have to take care of the house.I am a married woman, so no excuses.

My day starts off with getting up in the morning, preparing breakfast followed by packing his tiffin box.By the time all this is done, the maid comes and have to arrange things for her.Time just runs away, meantime have breakfast in hush hush and then run for the cab, else have to catch an auto.

Yeah i do catch up some sleep in the cab for an hour or so. :-) and then reach office, start off with the work.Its 6.45, have to run for the connecting cab again to reach other office and catch the cab to our stop. Reach home, prepare dinner, have it and then open the laptop, read for the next day. Its 12.00 by that time, go to bed and sleeppppppppppp.....

Huh its already morning again.... :-) But inspite of all these I am enjoying the pace of life.:-)

Douds Douda bhaaga bhaaga sa...

First Disastrous attempt

Sigh... never thought; that my first attempt of doing something new without asking any guidance from an experienced person would turn out to be a disaster..

All these days it was with the guidance of my mom,sis,inlaw, that i used to try out recipes.. Hm mm.. yesterday I decided to go ahead with a recipe from a print out sent by my friend. Never thought that it will be such a disaster :-(

Prepared chapatis and then thought of trying out something new, so started preparing tomato chutney (yeah it is new to me ). Followed the instructions carefully and accurately but I think I missed out something. Somehow when i was half way through i had a feeling that the result will be bad, but still had hopes till the end. At the end.. tasted it and huh.. its not even edible yaar..

Thought of adjusting but still the taste was so bad and weird.. the final destination of that chutney was dustbin and not our stomachs... :-(

Hmm raghus expression on tasting the chutney was also the same as it is in the image uploaded here.. :-(

Thought of doing RCA(root cause analysis) as to why my attempt failed(influence of my QA Husband) but was very disappointed after tasting it.So left it then and there itself..

Sigh.. my first disastrous attempt.. But I am an optimist and I will have some more attempts but with some guidance though..

Image courtesy:www.cartoonstock.com. Felt the cartoon is very apt for the situation so using it.

Right Out of Womans Heart

Adding on to the previous post of mine:

Got this forward,no idea whom to give credit still its worth reading ....

The woman in your life.... very well expressed….
Tomorrow you may marry a working woman. Is there one who doesn't want a working one? But you should marry with these facts as well.
Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are;
Who is earning almost as much as you do;
One, who has dreams and aspirations just as you have because she is as human as you are;

One, who has never entered the kitchen in her life just like you or your Sister haven't, as she was busy in studies and competing in a system that gives no special concession to girls for their culinary achievements.

One, who has lived and loved her parents & brothers & sisters, almost as much as you do for 20-25 years of her life;

One, who has bravely agreed to leave behind all that, her home, people who love her, to adopt your home, your family, your ways and even your family name.

One, who is somehow expected to be a master-chef from day #1, while you sleep oblivious to her predicament in her new circumstances, environment and that kitchen.

One, who is expected to make the tea, first thing in the morning and cook food at the end of the day, even if she is as tired as you are, maybe more, and yet never ever expected to complain; to be a servant, a cook, a mother, a wife, even if she doesn't want to; and is learning just like you are as to what you want from her; and is clumsy and sloppy at times and knows that you won't like it if she is too demanding, or if she learns faster than you;

One, who has her own set of friends, and that includes boys and even men at her workplace too, those, who she knows from school days and yet is willing to put all that on the back-burners to avoid your irrational jealousy, unnecessary competition and your inherent insecurities;
Working woman.........super woman?

Yes, she can drink and dance just as well as you can, but won't, simply because you won't like it, even though you say otherwise.

One, who can be late from work once in a while when deadlines, just like yours, are to be met;

One, who is doing her level best and wants to make this most important relationship in her entire life a grand success, if you just help her some and trust her.

One, who just wants one thing from you (as you are the only one she knows in your entire house) your unstinted support, your sensitivities and most importantly - your understanding or love if you may call it that.

But not many guys understand this...

One of the best told stories in the mail, every letter in this is felt and expressed directly from heart....
Right out of a women's heart!!!!

Working Women and their 'Husbands'

It was a pleasant surprise to meet one of my college senior, while I was busy shopping. After usual hi, hello; I informed her about my marriage and invited her.
And then came the topic in our conversation which is also the reason of the existence of this post.
As we chatted,came some advices from her, she being a experienced married working woman.I quietly accepted it as they were the facts.

Let me divide the post of mine into 3 varied experiences of 3 married women, to bring in the clarity.Of course there will be a conclusion from me and rest is left for you guys to comment.

Experience 1(My Senior): As we chatted, I came to know that, she has left the job and is now at home. She is now,pursuing music with more vigour. Good she is trying to do something she loved from deep of her heart.Then she said "Ranjitha:Now is the real test for you, which tests your patience of balancing personal life and career.As you move on you will understand that personal life is more important than career and you will have to make real tough decisions to have a happier life (?)"
I just retorted, my fiance seems to be supportive. Then she quickly replied "They are good at initial days but as days progress you will get more comments from them, about the cleanliness of home, cooking and the list never ends........" The chat was interrupted when her husband called her and we parted our ways.

Experience 2(My Hostel mate): During dinner, was discussing about this with one of my hostel mate, when she narrated me a story of her friend, who is a doctor by profession and even her husband is a doctor. they live in a joint family with her in laws. Her in law does not want to cook or do any household chores, as she wants her daughter in law to do it. She feels that her in law never did anything so why should she help her daughter in law. The poor girl after balancing household and the doctor profession, once shared with her husband that "It is becoming difficult for her". pop came the answer from the great husband "dear, I never told you to work outside, if it is difficult why do not you leave the job!!"

Experience 3(My friend): After listening to the above stories,one person who flashed in my mind was one of my colleague and a good friend.When I listen to her marriage experiences, my admiration for her husband two-folds. Its like he helps her in every household chore of hers.He cooks breakfast if she cooks the dinner,or viceversa. He gets up early and arranges for the maid, if she is sleeping in the morning,he helps her in washing, he helps her in arranging household, he goes with her for shopping.Wow..Its so wonderful to get such understanding husband.

Hmmm.. why is that for girls,the best place is home and not the outside world. Its always the girls who sacrifice for the family. Its the girls who should stop dreaming about a successful career, even if she wants to achieve, she will have to don the role of 'Super-Woman'.Why do guys forget that gals are equally helping the family financially and even they would have had dreams of growing in a career when they were young. I don't say that all guys are like that, but the maximum percentage of them fall into the category of wanting their wives to be at home. :-( . Some are lucky to have a understanding guy others are not.

Girls never want their husband to help in every chore, but a word of understanding will help them sail through the hardships.

We still can do it but we need just your understanding and a word of care. Just a caring hand would do.