Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Right Out of Womans Heart

Adding on to the previous post of mine:

Got this forward,no idea whom to give credit still its worth reading ....

The woman in your life.... very well expressed….
Tomorrow you may marry a working woman. Is there one who doesn't want a working one? But you should marry with these facts as well.
Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are;
Who is earning almost as much as you do;
One, who has dreams and aspirations just as you have because she is as human as you are;

One, who has never entered the kitchen in her life just like you or your Sister haven't, as she was busy in studies and competing in a system that gives no special concession to girls for their culinary achievements.

One, who has lived and loved her parents & brothers & sisters, almost as much as you do for 20-25 years of her life;

One, who has bravely agreed to leave behind all that, her home, people who love her, to adopt your home, your family, your ways and even your family name.

One, who is somehow expected to be a master-chef from day #1, while you sleep oblivious to her predicament in her new circumstances, environment and that kitchen.

One, who is expected to make the tea, first thing in the morning and cook food at the end of the day, even if she is as tired as you are, maybe more, and yet never ever expected to complain; to be a servant, a cook, a mother, a wife, even if she doesn't want to; and is learning just like you are as to what you want from her; and is clumsy and sloppy at times and knows that you won't like it if she is too demanding, or if she learns faster than you;

One, who has her own set of friends, and that includes boys and even men at her workplace too, those, who she knows from school days and yet is willing to put all that on the back-burners to avoid your irrational jealousy, unnecessary competition and your inherent insecurities;
Working woman.........super woman?

Yes, she can drink and dance just as well as you can, but won't, simply because you won't like it, even though you say otherwise.

One, who can be late from work once in a while when deadlines, just like yours, are to be met;

One, who is doing her level best and wants to make this most important relationship in her entire life a grand success, if you just help her some and trust her.

One, who just wants one thing from you (as you are the only one she knows in your entire house) your unstinted support, your sensitivities and most importantly - your understanding or love if you may call it that.

But not many guys understand this...

One of the best told stories in the mail, every letter in this is felt and expressed directly from heart....
Right out of a women's heart!!!!

Working Women and their 'Husbands'

It was a pleasant surprise to meet one of my college senior, while I was busy shopping. After usual hi, hello; I informed her about my marriage and invited her.
And then came the topic in our conversation which is also the reason of the existence of this post.
As we chatted,came some advices from her, she being a experienced married working woman.I quietly accepted it as they were the facts.

Let me divide the post of mine into 3 varied experiences of 3 married women, to bring in the clarity.Of course there will be a conclusion from me and rest is left for you guys to comment.

Experience 1(My Senior): As we chatted, I came to know that, she has left the job and is now at home. She is now,pursuing music with more vigour. Good she is trying to do something she loved from deep of her heart.Then she said "Ranjitha:Now is the real test for you, which tests your patience of balancing personal life and career.As you move on you will understand that personal life is more important than career and you will have to make real tough decisions to have a happier life (?)"
I just retorted, my fiance seems to be supportive. Then she quickly replied "They are good at initial days but as days progress you will get more comments from them, about the cleanliness of home, cooking and the list never ends........" The chat was interrupted when her husband called her and we parted our ways.

Experience 2(My Hostel mate): During dinner, was discussing about this with one of my hostel mate, when she narrated me a story of her friend, who is a doctor by profession and even her husband is a doctor. they live in a joint family with her in laws. Her in law does not want to cook or do any household chores, as she wants her daughter in law to do it. She feels that her in law never did anything so why should she help her daughter in law. The poor girl after balancing household and the doctor profession, once shared with her husband that "It is becoming difficult for her". pop came the answer from the great husband "dear, I never told you to work outside, if it is difficult why do not you leave the job!!"

Experience 3(My friend): After listening to the above stories,one person who flashed in my mind was one of my colleague and a good friend.When I listen to her marriage experiences, my admiration for her husband two-folds. Its like he helps her in every household chore of hers.He cooks breakfast if she cooks the dinner,or viceversa. He gets up early and arranges for the maid, if she is sleeping in the morning,he helps her in washing, he helps her in arranging household, he goes with her for shopping.Wow..Its so wonderful to get such understanding husband.

Hmmm.. why is that for girls,the best place is home and not the outside world. Its always the girls who sacrifice for the family. Its the girls who should stop dreaming about a successful career, even if she wants to achieve, she will have to don the role of 'Super-Woman'.Why do guys forget that gals are equally helping the family financially and even they would have had dreams of growing in a career when they were young. I don't say that all guys are like that, but the maximum percentage of them fall into the category of wanting their wives to be at home. :-( . Some are lucky to have a understanding guy others are not.

Girls never want their husband to help in every chore, but a word of understanding will help them sail through the hardships.

We still can do it but we need just your understanding and a word of care. Just a caring hand would do.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

GenDa Phool..

The song 'GenDa Phool' from the movie Delhi-6 has some charm in it. Ever since I have heard it, i have been humming it atleast once a day. But never did I have the anxiety to know the meaning of the lyrics, until today when my friend asked me what does 'Genda phool' mean?.

Ah.. thanks to my hindi knowledge, which prompted me to tell the meaning as CauliFlower. God knows where I got this idea from..:-) lol
But somewhere I knew that I was wrong, came back and went to our own knowledge base 'Google' for the answer. Wow..there are 4960 results for Genda Phool.. Hmm .. amazing..

Came across a link which gave me the meaning of the whole song, here is the brief from the link:

Hoye hoye hoye, Hoye hoye hoye

Saiyaan ched dewe,
>>my husband keeps on teasing me
Nanad chutki leve,
>>the younger sister of my husband keeps on taunting me
Sasural genda phool,
>>sasural = in law's house, genda: name of a flower, marigold
Saas gaari deve
>>the mother of my husband keeps on abusing me
Dewar samjha deve
>>the younger brother of my husband keeps on explaining to me
Sasural genda phool
Choda babul ka angana
>>I had left the house of my father
Bhaave deraa piya ka, ho
>>I am liking the house of my husband
Saiyaan hain vypaari
>>my husband is a businessman
Chale hain pardes
> >he is going to foreign place
Sooratiyaan niharun
> >I am looking at his face
jiyara bhaari hove,
>>my heart is becoming heavy
Bushirt pahine
>>having attired in a shirt
khaai ke bida paan
>>having chewn a betel
Poore Raipur se alag hai, Saiyaan ji ki shaan
>>the glory of my husband is apart from that of anyone else in entire Raipur city

The essence lies surely in 'genda phool' .... gendha aka marigold is a special type of a flower. Its an Inflorescence. Inflorescence, as in every leaf of 'gendha phool' is a complete flower in itself. While every leaf/petal of the 'gendha' is a flower in itself, a gendha is complete, beautiful and can live only when all petals are together. sasural gendha phool - the sasural has so many characters : saas, devar, nanad, et cetera, ... some not so nice to the bahu (saas gaari/gaali dewe) ... some nice to her (dewarji samjha lewein), yet the newly wed bahu knows that her sasural is beautiful (and will be a happy place) because of each and every character.

courtesy: Mayank,