Friday, January 9, 2009

I am Special


Hmmm... quite a philosophical post. But could not stop myself from writing this.

Have started introspecting myself more and more these days. The quiet 15 minutes i spend in my hostel after the dinner help me do this.

Off late I have tried to conclude the reason for my uneasiness. Often I compared myself with others, i have really been harsh to the body of mine whenever i lost something. Whether it was because of my fault or other's, the loss of depression was incurred by my body and mind.

I felt depressed when someone else got an offer, although i deserved the offer more.
I felt demotivated when I looked at the handicaps i had, after looking at others.
Even when I shined with an achievment, I was unhappy; the reason being, I compared myself to someone above me.

I compared when I was happy, I compared when I was sad. And the end result is I never enjoyed the small gifts of life. I never was happy.

Now I know, I am special and so I cannot compare myself to others. If I compare then I am disrespecting myself. Which I will not.
I try to tell myself these words whenever I face something annoying. yet I go back to my old habits sometimes.

Old habits die hard............................

1 comment:

Madhan said...

Every dissatisfaction is spur for a new action. The moment you are content, you loose purpose of life. Truly self opinion though.